17 01 2012

Didn’t think you could fail things, so many times… Thats the main thing thats playing on my mind… Oh and the other thing.. not gonna get into that… But yeah.. I realised to day that i get agitated quite easily… so that leads to more mistakes… tomorrow aint gonna be any better… Nor any other day… it’s starting to suck now, real badly.. :/ if it wasnt for a couple of people… I’d of given up totally by now and said ”Right, I’m not doing anything anymore” but of course, i havent.. In fact for some stupid reason… i’m pushing harder (any ideas on why, message me:S) but it’s not good, cause if i fail, then I’ll probably keep on doing it.. I’m one of those people who, like, cant fail? and if they do, it’s bad for them? As in it dents confidence and it’s a psychological thing, it’s bad, makes you think youre bad? well.. it does me anyhow…

**Im going off track, so, main points**

– Lost my best friend, thats what i get for continuing to be an a******e to people

– I know I’ll start to push everyone else away, including people who have said they’ll always be there

– I know, this is gonna be a crap year, even if i get over this thing

– I’ll be Day 0 for a while, this way, it’s just, I know whats coming – I attempted to pick up the pieces of my life. They can stay on the floor for all i care.

– I’ve learnt it’s best to keep things to yourself, cause I’d still have my bestfriend if i had of, he’d of known no different to the usual situation, and i would of, seemed normal, i guess :/

– I wont talk to no one… not anymore.. Well, not withot decent persuasion.

– Patterns are always there… I’ve fallen ”back” into an old one

– I’ll still end up being asked whats wrong, and I’ll not be able to say anything

To wind this in….






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